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Winter Newsletter 2010
"I don't know how many times I've told them/him/you ..."
What does this often overheard phrase tell us, and how often do we notice frustration in the person saying it?
It sometimes seems that B doesn't ‘catch' A's intended meaning.
We've just been passed a book called Words That Work: It's Not What You Say, It's What People Hear by Frank I. Luntz. We haven't yet read it, but love the title and the recommendation ‘you will want to make changes in the way you communicate'. Tomorrow I'll start the read and let you know ...
I sometimes liken communication to a ball being passed between people. The variables in this exchange include attitude, aptitude, altitude, and a whole lot more including the size and weight of the ball being thrown.
If the ball isn't received - for whatever reason, communication ceases.
Remember, no matter how brilliant your ‘content,' if the ball falls short, wide or causes injury, the message is lost.
Think about how poor communication can be reflected in workforce motivation, customer satisfaction and ultimately, the bottom line.
Like anything, whatever you practice, you become better at and sometimes we can be need a little advice or guidance from an expert to help us improve our game. We recommend the NLP Meta Model as a great framework to explore precise communication. Let us know if you think your business might benefit from a free ‘cleaner communication' demo.
And you might be shocked to discover what powerful changes a few simple tweaks can make.
"He who pours his purse into his head will always be rich." Ben Franklin
Workplace Temperature
How often do you use a thermometer?
Not for air ambient temperature, but to measure your workforce satisfaction and motivation.
How do you know whether or not your workforce is happily engaged?
One simple 'health check' is to listen to workforce lexicon at its most informal.
When you hear yourself or your business being referred to as ‘they/them' you might realize a sense of distance.
Whereas ‘we/us' suggests a stronger sense of ownership and autonomy. Useful feedback? We think so!
THIS may be very useful if you're a parent!
THIS or THAT?
SAY THE FOLLOWING OUT LOUD to emphasis the difference between this or that ...
THIS pain feels close and real, THAT pain feels farther away.
THIS tea sounds more appealing than THAT tea.
You sound like you approve of THIS TV programme, but not THAT one.
When you notice the different effects THESE words can have, then you can begin to use them more deliberately and with influence.
THIS may be an interesting experiment when it comes to usefully guiding children, don't you think?
Teaching Tip from Emily
Coming To Your Senses!
Disruptive students in the classroom or unruly kids at home?
Do you sometimes struggle to settle a group when their attention flits all over the place?
Try this - adapted from Betty Erickson's famous hypnotic induction.
Play the sensory game with your students or kids - ask them to identify 3 unique things they can see, hear, feel, touch, smell, taste. Then 2 (additional) things ... then 1 more thing ... and notice how, as you can narrow their focus you can bring them to a calm and manageable state (and encourage conscious awareness).
Variation:
1) cut out and laminate images to represent each sense
2) place images in drawstring bag - to be picked out one at a time
3) roll a dice to determine the number of sensory experiences described.
Notice how attention can easily become more focused.
Emily Allinson
Leiden, Holland
info@easyspeak.nl
www.easyspeak.nl
NLP in Education
"NLP is a learning model ..."
Read how, as part of the Meta training team, we are delivering NLP in the world of Education in this latest article by Kate Benson, International Director of Education for the Society of NLP.
Click here to reach Public Services HR Journal front cover. Type page 65 in small box at top for direct link to Kate's page.
Success Tip from Tony
PASSWORD
What do you really want in life?
Why not use modern technology to help you achieve this and change your computer password to your goal?
Clearly this needs to be really short and sweet, so how do you articulate your goal in just a few letters? (Even the process of thinking this out helps you get closer to your goal.)
Whatever it is - get it on your computer password.
You wouldn't believe some of the stuff I've logged in with in the past!
Whenever you log in, you are literally forcing yourself to remember your goal.
Soon it just becomes second nature to think about your password and your goal at the same time
Some examples - IamaMillionaire, NewHouse10, GetFit, MoreConfident, NewJobByXmas, etc etc. You get the message.
And what's my password at the moment?
Number01SelfHelp.
Tony Wrighton
www.howtoaudiobooks.info
NLP based courses and training days - Spring, Summer & Autumn 2010 - contact us for dates and details
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NLPAnecdote:
As kids, my brother and I would rummage around in our grandfather's shed-cum-workshop at the bottom of his garden in deepest Gloucestershire. It was a magical place for us - exploring nook, cranny and object - blissfully ignorant of whatever it was we didn't know we shouldn't do or touch!
It was a place that seduced our noses into associating our granddad with the smells of oil, petrol, sawdust, sweat, and goodness knows what other mixtures were randomly stored in jam jars and empty food tins. Our little fingers probed every cavity and contour as we explored carcasses of engines, motor bikes and things yet unexplained.
According to family lore, my grandfather had a passion for taking things apart and putting them back together, 'often with a few nuts and bolts to spare'! And what's more, not only did my grandfather's old motorbikes stay together; the intuitive ‘adjustments' seemed to actually improve their performance, sometimes exponentially, despite missing the odd nut!
How wonderful that Mother Nature gifts us the ability to play and have fun, and provides us with an instinct about things we don't understand as well as curiosity to discover things we don't yet know exist, wouldn't you agree?
Anyone keen to explore NLP processes might easily escalate their journey by developing those gifts of play, curiosity and instinct. Because by ‘knowing nothing' and ‘expecting nothing' we get to see things as they really are.
"I am always doing things I can't do - that's how I get to do them." Pablo Picasso
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